What Is Mediation?

Preparing for the First Session

2009-10-26T13:34:00.002+07:00

While there's no way for us to forecast exactly what will happen during our time together, it is typical to spend a first session mainly "Listening to Each Other" part of the process.

It is important to stress that the process is here to support YOU. You are in control of how much and what you talk about. (Which is also why it is helpful to clarify your goals for mediation.

Goals:

Creating a safe place for us to listen to each other
Sharing our stories
Listening to understand (not to agree or approve)
Identifying the most important issues and needs

Process:

Introduction and Welcoming: reviewing the purpose, process and role of mediator, making a safe place
Sharing Stories: The parties take turns sharing their experience and needs. While you share, your goal is to say to the other party what you most want them to understand in a way that is most likely to be understood. While they share, your goal is to listen to understand - not necessarily to agree or approve of what they did or say.
Identifying Key Issues: issues may be generally seen as healing and/or problem solving; hearing each party’s experience points us in the direction we should go. This may include making a list of issues that have been named, checking for understanding, and prioritizing.
Deciding What Comes Next: we'll discuss whether and when we should meet again and how to protect the progress we've made.

Roles:

The mediators are resources to you. We have a process, but not an agenda. We are not judges, arbitrators, or advocates. A successful mediation is one in which parties are empowered to handle conflict and stress in more constructive and creative ways.
The parties are the experts about this conflict. You know best what your feelings and needs are. We believe in your capacity to handle conflict in ways that best meet those needs and it is your opportunity to use the mediators to support you in your journey of transformation.

How You Can Prepare:

Think About: What is my goal in participating in this mediation? What do I hope will change?
Think About: When I consider my goals, am I more concerned with solving a problem, healing emotional wounds, or both?
Think About: What needs have gone unmet because of the conflict? What are the most important needs I would like met now?
Think About: This is my chance to have a safe place and support to say what is on my heart. What is it that I really want the other person to understand about my experience?
Think About: How can I express that in the way most likely to get my needs met?
Think About: Is there anything I need to be aware of in terms of interacting with the other people? Do I feel uncomfortable about anything? What expectations and assumptions do I have? Are there any topics I am likely to feel angry or sad about? What do I need to do to be in the best possible emotional, physical and spiritual state?

Back to the Index

What Is Mediation?

2009-10-26T13:28:00.001+07:00

About the Mediation Process

- Most mediations don’t progress from one stage to another in sequential fashion. Instead, we move from one type of interaction to another, sometimes jumping and sometimes stepping, as our feelings are heard and our needs met. This includes a description of the types of things you're likely to do during a mediation.

Preparing for the First Session

- While there's no way for us to forecast exactly what will happen during our time together, it is typical to spend a first session mainly "Listening to Each Other" part of the process. It is important to stress that the process is here to support YOU. You are in control of how much and what you talk about. This includes "Think About" questions to help clarify your goals, needs, message, and possible vulnerability factors/triggers.

How Our Mediation Services Can Assist You

- Peace Bridges aims to help people who have a conflict to manage it in the best way possible. Our first step is to offer you opportunity to discuss your concerns in a private discussion with a trained mediator. From here we can recommend a way to proceed.

What to Expect at a Mediation

- By agreeing to come to mediation you have taken an important step towards resolving your dispute. The goal of the mediation is to reach an agreement that all parties find reasonable and in their best interests.

About the mediation process

2009-10-26T13:23:00.003+07:00

Most mediations don’t progress from one stage to another in sequential fashion.

Instead, we move from one type of interaction to another, sometimes jumping and sometimes stepping, as our feelings are heard and our needs met. So the following is more like a description of the types of things we do together in a mediation. Not every mediation contains all of these things, though. The process was made to serve us, and not us to serve the process.

1. Private Meetings:

Goal: Connecting with each other, clarifying party feelings and needs, setting us up for success
Before joint mediation: Initial Intake, conflict coaching and process design
During a joint mediation: Connect, explain, appreciate, build confidence, prepare
Ongoing: Case Assessment (for Process Design)

2. Listening to Each Other

Goal: Creating a safe space to talk; listening to understand (not agree), identifying issues
Introduction and Welcoming: reviewing the purpose, process and role of mediator, making a safe place
Sharing Stories: begins the mediation in earnest, but we often return to sharing stories as new elements are revealed or understood during the process
Identifying Key Issues: issues may be generally seen as healing and/or problem solving; hearing each party’s experience points us in the direction we should go

3. Protecting the Progress

Goal: Making plans together for how to honor the work done in mediation
Confidentiality: what will be shared with whom? What does confidentiality mean in this setting? Are there any exceptions? When can confidentiality perpetuate injustice? How will you handle that?
Interactions: What kind of interactions will you have with each other? What is safe for you? What support do you need? For example, do you need to cc: emails to the mediators?

4. Exploring Issues

Goal: Increasing understanding, connecting to feelings and needs
For Healing: grieving, addressing trust issues, often relationship-focused
For Problem Solving: building consensus, addressing disagreements, often policy-focused

5. Moving Forward

Goal: making requests and building agreement; connective instead of coercive
Generating options: broadening perspectives, being creative
Evaluating options: choosing options that best meet everyone’s needs

6. Follow Up:

Goal: Evaluate usefulness of process and determine what continued support is needed, including referrals
We use a combination of assessments and personal contact.

Back to the Index

How Our Mediation Services Can Assist You

2008-04-28T16:22:00.002+07:00

Peace Bridges aims to help people who have a conflict to manage it in the best way possible. Our first step is to offer you opportunity to discuss your concerns in a private discussion with a trained mediator. From here we can recommend a way to proceed.

What Happens In A Private Discussion?
We give you a chance to share whatever you feel is appropriate about the conflict you are experiencing. Usually one or two mediators will listen to your concerns, explain ways we may be able to assist, and ultimately leave it up to you decide whether Peace Bridges is the best option for you. If not we may make suggestions about other groups able to assist.

Is this meeting confidential?
Yes. The mediators and Peace Bridges will keep confidential everything you say during the private discussion. We will not even tell others that a meeting has taken place unless you give us permission to do so.

How Much Time Will It Take?
Please set aside one and a half hours for the discussion. If more time is needed, you and the mediators can schedule another session.

What happens after a private discussion?
You decide whether or not Peace Bridges can assist you further. Maybe all you needed was a safe place to share your concerns and will not require anything else. If appropriate we may be able to organize a meeting between yourself and the other people you have a conflict with. The aim of a meeting like this is to give everyone equal opportunity to share concerns in a safe environment. Each party would get a chance to talk about the situation without any interruption. Then there would be an open discussion, and mediators would help you decide what the important issues are. Any agreements reached would be noted.

How Much Does It Cost?
Peace Bridges does not charge for an initial meeting, however if mediation goes ahead we may make a recommendation about a donation to assist the service to continue.

If you have any questions, please contact us. Please feel welcome to organize a time to meet for a private discussion if you have not done so already.

Back to the Index

What To Expect at a Mediation

2008-04-28T15:10:00.002+07:00

By agreeing to come to mediation you have taken an important step towards resolving your dispute. The goal of the mediation is to reach an agreement that all parties find reasonable and in their best interests

What Happens In A Mediation Session?
Each of you will get a chance to talk about your situation without any interruption. Then there will be an open discussion, and mediators will help you decide what the important issues are. If you reach an agreement the mediations will write it down and make sure it says what you want to say. Each party will sign and receive a copy to take home.

How Much Time Will It Take?
Please set aside two and a half hours for this mediation session. If more time is needed, you and the mediators can schedule another session.

Is this meeting confidential?
Yes. The mediators and Peace Bridges will keep confidential everything you say during the mediation.

At the beginning of the mediation you'll be asked to sign a form that explains that our mediators will not tell anyone, including boards of governance, what happened in the mediation. It also reminds you that mediators are not advocates and cannot give you legal advice or judgment.

Who Will Be There?
Two trained mediators will run the session. The staff will discuss with you who will be invited, and who has agreed to attend. The program does not allow advocates or other representative to be present unless this has been agreed to by all parties and the mediators at least one week prior to the meetings.

How Much Does It Cost?
There is no obligation to pay for the service however the option of offering a donation to allow the service to continue will be discussed at your private interview.

If you have any questions, please contact us. We hope this mediation session will help your situation.

Back to the Index